This is just too good to be hidden away as a comment...thanks Nils :-)
Man, oh man, my sides, they have split.
For once again we've put our foot in it.
For men and boys, as you now see,
To dirt and grime, have affinity.
The differences they say are two,
Between the boys and older few.
Men have at one time hopefully done
A load of washing from which has run...
the vilest... greenest... reddest... slime,
to ensure no repeat of mentioned crime.
The alternative is soon found though,
in form of vehicle, with friends in tow.
For mud and grime improves the looks
of 4x4's driven 'oer muddy brooks.
And when the ladies go to town,
With garden hose, it is washed down.
They get revenge, the ladies dear,
when said men get stuck, 'tween here and there.
Taking on a slope that be to steep,
Or in the mud with brand new Jeep.
And home they come with wounded pride,
To the ultimate 'lekkerkry' of their bride.
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